Jaipur and the Holi Festival

Every time I go to write of my experiences, I find myself not being able to put it into words. Here's my best..

Arriving in Jaipur was an adventure all its own. The train ride was 14 hours. Claudia and I were in regular sleeper class (and foolishly thinning we'd actually get our bed to itself). When first boarding the train, we were the only ones in our cabin. I knew of course there would be more prior once we got to bigger cities. I want aware of just how many people! By midday, we only had one bed and there were Indian women sitting with us putting their kids I'm our lap. At one point there were 7 other people in our bed besides us (and our you bed had several people to and a lot of luggage). India is making me question if I am claustrophobic.
After a few hours of not being able to move we had to kick everyone out of our bed, asking them to take the top one.

Our first day in Jaipur, we traveled a bit around the city by tuktuk, seeing the money palace and water palace. We did a little shopping and find a new guest house (which come to find, looks are deceiving. It was not worth it...) Unfortunately, this was the day when I got grabbed. I had been mentally prepared to be on my guard for holi, but the day before I didn't expect anything to happen. I was really taken off guard because it was an employee of western union. Long story short, I pushed him away and slapped him across the face. It was just groping, nothing more. Being put in this situation though made me realize just how vulnerable I am as a woman here. Claudia was just a few steps below me and he still had the nerve to try that. It's been heavy on my heart, and more so because my friends were also groped during holi. It saddens me that such a beautiful place filled with so much spirituality can also be filled with so much disrespect...

Other than the expected groping of holi, it was an amazing experience. I still have color on me!

Claudia, Lisa, Nicola, Ashlyn, and I danced and celebrated at Nicola's hotel for a while, then ventured to the streets for a second time. Our first venture out we were ambushed by groups of children with colourful powder. They always would put it on your face, mostly the cheeks. We then came across a group of women dancing and they invited us to dance with them for a while. The kids continued to color us and some of the women did as well. Our second venture to the streets was even more amazing. We met this (very handsome. Dreadlocks and a beard, what more could I ask for??) guy named Daniel from Spain. He was in the back of some guys motor bike. We all ended up taking the bike (two at a time) to the pink city. Claudia and I were the last to go. Now, I don't know if I have mentioned the insanity of riding around in India. It's complete madness. Anyways, it was a bit too rowdy there so we walked up to the Nagar Palace. On our adventure through the small streets we can across a family who invited us inside. We danced in their courtyard with all the children and several women. It was amazing the genuine feeling of this moment. This had been the most amazing experience of India this far. Once the music stopped and the color was running lie, they served us the sweetest lassi I've had. After many pictures, we continued on our journey to the palace. The police followed us up most of the way, beating off people who harassed us. I think our presence May have caused a bit of a scene...
The day ended with good food, a new friend, and lasting memories.

Now, I sit on my first bus heading to Ajmer, then Pushkar. I look forward to the calm, the opportunity to relax a bit and reflect, a moment to really see how much India has already changed me. I see myself so much stronger already. I am no longer being passive or unsure of myself. India is just what I needed. I can see so clearly how just being in India is going to turn me into a better yoga teacher, business woman, and person in general.

Watch out world. I'm coming.

Quote to Live by

"You are me, and I am you. You cultivate the flower in yourself, so that I will be beautiful."

This quote is in my Thich Naat Han notebook I've been using as my journal. It touches a soft part in my heart and brings light to my soul. It is such a great truth.

I love this quote specifically because I tend to always want to help others. I put their needs before mine and often I lose a piece of myself in the process. But I've also realized for quite some time now that we are all reflections of ourselves. So, once again I'm being shown that in order to help someone else you must help yourself. Maybe this is why I feel I've been unsuccessful in truly helping.

Finally, I'm going to accept and practice this truth. I'm going to focus on myself, my spiritual journey, and enhancing my inner light so that I truly can help others on their individual paths. "I'd you want to change the world, first you must change yourself."

Arhanta Yoga Ashram

Arriving at Arhanta, I was so nervous. Accomplishing a dream is actually a really scary experience. It feels surreal to be in a place you've thought so much about, to be on your true life path. It felt like the right place to be as soon as I got there. The energy was perfect, calm and contemplative. Meeting everyone felt a bit like connecting with people I've already known. We all clicked so well.

The days were long and certainly tested my mental, emotional, and physical capabilities. We began with mediation and chanting at 6 am. At 7:15 am we had silent breakfast immediately followed by how to teach, which went straight until lunch. After silent lunch(around 12 pm) we each had a different karma yoga job to compete. Kim and I helped the gardener by loosening the dirt in each of the gardens and doing a small bit of weeding. Karma yoga never took long, which was a blessing because it gave us a little extra time between lunch and the philosophy (@ 1 pm) to do or laundry by hand or study. After philosophy was a two hour asana class. Following asana was dinner. Then there was self meditation, competing the day around 8pm.

Philosophy was an amazing class, though I was always exhausted. We learned about the Vedic philosophy which was on par with almost everything I already believe. It's nature based and most of the philosophy makes sense. I am still questioning the process of liberation to bring your soul to moksha. I think I'm too fond of Earth to want to leave. I'd rather spend many life times here and just become more aware and in tune with nature. I also am still struggling a bit with the karma philosophy. It's difficult to see other people suffering and believe that it is their karmic accounting, that it is what they deserve. I understand that it's over many lifetimes that we create our accounting, so one may suffer because of their choices in a time we don't remember. It seems to me though that this is a good mechanism to simply accept other people's suffering and not doing anything about it. It seems almost suppressing. Anyways, I loved the information, especially the pattern of life being "generation, organization, destruction"; Spelling out God, connecting all religions to nature. As I've always said, each religion is saying the same thing just with different words and stories.

Asana class was wonderful. We were definitely pushed and I came to see how capable I am. Our teachers knew how far we could go and what we could do, even if we were unsure about it. They always said, "don't think, just do it" and when it comes to asanas this is the best advice. Before coming to Arhanta I couldn't do a headstand or many other asanas. Now, because they taught me to let go of my thoughts and just do it, I can hold headstand for several minutes no problem. The other wise words they said were too trust the body, it will do what it needs to.

There is so much I could say about the course but to make a long story short, Arhanta was the perfect place for me to start my journey with yoga. I've gained so much from this program; not only knowledge and a certification but a new extended family.

Love to Mother for making this opportunity happen, for bringing a dream to fruition.